SuperAdvice: Don’t Be An iBoob

Posted by SuperwifeJenny on March 4th, 2012. Filed under: Ellie Lynn, SuperBaby, SuperMom, SUPERWIFE JENNY, This is Me.

Friends, do I have another Superwife lesson for you…

It’s possible that you may have a young toddler who loves technology as much as Superbaby does. Have you ever let your child play with your iPhone or iPad? Does it buy you a few minutes every now and then – to set your kiddo up with your iPad while you blowdry your hair or hastily apply some makeup?

Well… a word of caution:

Your baby knows how to embarrass you. Just when you think you have everything under control… even when you’re not anywhere NEAR your baby – that little one OWNS you.

Let’s say – hypothetically – that you need JUSTAFEWDAMNMINUTES to finish getting ready the morning of a business trip. You’re frazzled, you’re behind, and your hair is a wreck. Your little one is wreaking havoc on everything and anything, so you set her up with your iPad on the floor next to you as you sit down to dry your hair. You haven’t had a chance to grab any clothes quite yet, so you perch yourself on an office chair with just a towel around your waist – no biggie, it’s just you and kiddo in the house anyway.

She plays contently, flipping through apps and bobbing her head to the song she’s smartly selected from your music library – giving you just the time you need to beautify yourself and then proceed to get dressed.

You might think this is an innocent, easy solution to your morning mayhem – DON’T BE FOOLED. Because the rest of this story might go like this:

You’ve kissed your kiddo goodbye. You’ve packed your carry-on bag for the plane, complete with your iPad to keep you busy for the next few hours. You take your seat, squeezed in between two nice gentlemen, on your four-hour flight. You open up your bag, pull out your iPad, turn it on, and…

HELLOOOOOOOOO BREASTS.

You now – hypothetically – find yourself staring at an iPad-sized photograph of YOUR OWN BOOBS. Taken by – you guessed it – your conniving, sneaky sweet, innocent little baby.

Now I don’t know how you would act upon finding yourself in this predicament, but IIII would probably let out a squeal, freak out and fumble until I accidentally drop my iPad, turn bright red and immediately start sweating profusely… and then I’d spend the next four hours staring straight ahead and not making ANY eye contact or conversation with the gentlemen on  either side of me. If this ever happened to me.

So… a word to the wise – either don’t let baby play with your iPhone/iPad/smartphone/camera, or check your damn photostream before you leave the house.

Just in case.

Self-Portrait by Superbaby

Did this make you laugh? Cry? Feel something? Leave a comment and let me know, or subscribe to the RSS feed to have future posts delivered to your feed reader! Cheers!

7 Responses to SuperAdvice: Don’t Be An iBoob

  1. Emma

    Oh you poor thing ;-) what a funny story to tell Ellie when she’s an adult.

  2. Mom

    EEEEEEEEEK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. SuperwifeJenny

    Oh we’re building up an arsenal of stories to tell at this little one’s high school graduation, wedding, etc!! She’s a character!
    SuperwifeJenny recently posted..Pop go the Cheerios

  4. Granma

    Yep….she’s a very talented young lady and has only to see someone do something once and she’s got it! As you said — check your photos before you leave the house. I’m so glad to hear you’re collecting ‘tales’ to tell at her graduation!

  5. Reeni

    Just HILARIOUS! Jenny, you never seize to amaze me with your funny stories! The modern day “Lucy”! Maybe you should think of a tv reality show(:-))

  6. Jana Helm

    Love reading your stuff, need more laugh in my life,and this was a good laugh. Wonder what those men were thinking Lol!

  7. Cindy

    Really interesting and funny post. Things like that just happen :)
    Cindy recently posted..Are Gay People Born This Way ?

Leave a Reply

CommentLuv badge
11111111111111111